Being a stay at home mom is the most amazing opportunity I have ever had. Even so, I notice certain controlling tendencies in myself that have developed because of this role, that I never used to display. None of them are bad tendencies or traits that I would ever be ashamed of but they are traits that I am thankful I was able to recognize and work to improve little by little. In case you are noticing some of the same tension and urges to control situations, let me give you some encouragement-
My attachment to my little one is natural and expected because I am with him 24/7. I am confident in saying that I am not alone here. I wake up when he wakes up, drop what I am doing for whatever his needs are at that moment, and I play with him. I am able to recognize his quirks and personality developing daily and I get to see tons of “firsts” which is amazing . All of that said, it’s important to be able to let go a little. When my husband is home, he wants to help out as much as he can. In doing so, things like routines and habits are questioned. “Does he need the fan on when I put him down for a nap?” “Does he wear a sleep sack for a nap too?” things like that. Often, I would find myself either getting an attitude in answering those questions because, duh, I do this all day every day, OR I would just take over and do it myself because it was easier. Neither of these responses to your spouse (or any other helping hand) wanting to help and bond with the child you share are good responses. I needed to let go and trust. If a nap routine takes twice as long, then so be it. It’s a learning experience and bonding experience and it’s equally as important for me to let others help as it is for them to want to help. Not doing it all is a good thing because you won’t always be able to do everything. Life happens, and there will be a need for someone else to step in and complete a routine for you eventually. It will all be okay and your baby will still thrive!
Now lets not be afraid to ask for help and accept help from others when it’s offered.